The archive


Dec 23, 2025

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9 min read

💦 Breaking wind

And David officially calls daddy for backup

💦 Breaking wind

Dec 22, 2025

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9 min read

💦 Elon's huge package

And it's the Great Valuation, Charlie Brown

💦 Elon's huge package

Dec 19, 2025

•

10 min read

💦 Truth fusion

And the dankest executive order ever just dropped

💦 Truth fusion

Dec 18, 2025

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10 min read

💦 Blue balls

And Zuck is a micromanager

💦 Blue balls

Dec 17, 2025

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10 min read

💦 No rest for the wicked

And IPOs just met their ultimate match: Series L

💦 No rest for the wicked
LockSimple

Dec 16, 2025

•

2 min read

💦 Stop what you're doing

Outsource that sh*t

💦 Stop what you're doing

Dec 16, 2025

•

10 min read

💦 Sucks to suck

And we may never spy on our friends' Zestimates again

💦 Sucks to suck

Dec 15, 2025

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10 min read

💦 It’s high time

And Charizard's reign as the GOAT is over

💦 It’s high time

Dec 12, 2025

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11 min read

💦 Do you want to build a slop-man?

And our long national "Code Red" may finally be over

💦 Do you want to build a slop-man?

Dec 11, 2025

•

10 min read

💦 Stephen Hawkish

And AI goes to space

💦 Stephen Hawkish

Dec 10, 2025

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10 min read

💦 To the moon

And Cracker Barrel finds out actions have consequences

💦 To the moon

Dec 9, 2025

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10 min read

💦 We are done when I say we are done

And we're making Farm Aid great again

💦 We are done when I say we are done

Dec 8, 2025

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11 min read

💦 Acquisition & chill

And will SpaceX IPO just to spite Sam Altman?

💦 Acquisition & chill

Dec 5, 2025

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10 min read

💦 Zuck walks it back

And Paramount writes a strongly worded letter

💦 Zuck walks it back

Dec 4, 2025

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9 min read

💦 The degen tech race

And an absolutely brutal jobs report

💦 The degen tech race

Dec 3, 2025

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11 min read

💦 First loser advantage

And Michael Dell just became a Gen Alpha legend

💦 First loser advantage
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