Hey there weekday warrior,
Here’s what’s on tap today… AI stocks all got rekt on calls for a slowdown, Paramount wants a fresh start, and all eyes are on K-Woww this week.
Now, enjoy the next 3 minutes and 9 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.
Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,
PS… thanks in advance for doing your part in helping keep TWC like the Fed (think: free and independent) by checking out today’s advertising partner.
Slower daddy
Live look at @sama, Dario, and Phony Stark right about now:
AI stonks got taken out back yesterday after basically every AI CEO who matters (suck it, Johnny Ternus) spent the weekend doomering over AI’s future…
Micron $MU ( ▼ 5.25% ), Intel $INTC ( ▼ 5.59% ), HPE $HPE ( ▼ 10.76% ), and SoftBank $SFTBY ( ▼ 15.13% ) all got bent over and shown the 50 states yesterday (think: down bad).
ICYMI, this whole thing kicked off when an Anthropic researcher (who looks kinda like the new Harry Potter) quit last week and then tried to mog everyone with a sob story about the AI industry “gambling with our lives.”
Dario Amodium followed up over the weekend with an essay titled “We Must Pace the Frontier” (says the guy feeding us into the wood chipper).
Then Scam Altman and even Lon Corelone jumped on the bandwagon. And when was the last time these 3 guys agreed on anything?
Friendly reminder: Sam already said a 2026 IPO for OpenAI is not in the cards… which probably made the co-sign a bit easier to swallow.
“So everyone agrees about this, right? Right?”
Nope. Donny Technology had some choice words for the new united AI decels…
Per #47, "There is a SICK conspiracy going on against AI and Data Centers, and the only one that is happy about it is China… Conspiracy Theorists, Treasonists, Traitors, and Leakers, BEWARE!"
When Did You Last Compare Car Insurance?
Car insurance rates can change more often than you might expect, which means your current policy may no longer be your best deal.
Taking a few minutes to compare quotes could help you find the same coverage at a lower price.
Money.com's free comparison tool lets you review rates from providers in your area, all by answering a few simple questions.
See if you could save today.
🛑 Friendly reminder: our advertising partners help us keep the lights on around here, so do me a solid and check out Money.com.
+ Y’allywood
New report just dropped, and things are looking pretty, pretty bad for Tinseltown if Paramount $PSKY ( ▲ 2.55% ) actually takes the kids to her mom’s house (read: leaves).
Turns out CA could lose up to 58k jobs and $21B in economic output if PSKY gets the hell out of Dodge.
Friendly reminder: Nepo Davey has threatened to move out on October 1 if a deal isn’t reached. On the short list of new homes: Georgia, Tennessee, and Texas.
Per Attorney General Bobby Bonta, “California is the fourth largest economy in the world and the best place to do business."
+ Let’s just call this one a fluke, Kev…
Core CPI jumped 0.3% in August, which is slightly higher than the nerds were looking for...
Meanwhile, missionary CPI rose 0.4% for the month, hovering at 3.4% annual. Quick math: that’s >2%…
Obviously, odds of a rate hike are high AF right now, so all eyes are on K-Woww and the Fed this week.
+ Rise and grind fired
Oracle $ORCL ( ▼ 3.65% ) went ahead and sh*tcanned another round of employees yesterday at 6 am because of… you already know.
Ex-employees were prompted to sign right away to get their severance, so they got that going for them, which is nice…
Friendly reminder: this is Larry’s third round of cuts this year. 21k people already got axed in 2026, and $1.8B in severance has been paid so far.
You're Invited: Live Tax-Smart Investing Webinar
Your portfolio could be losing more to taxes than you might realize. On September 17, Range's CFPs and CPAs share the portfolio moves that can help you maximize your after-tax returns — join us live, and bring your questions for Q&A.
This webinar is for informational purposes only and does not constitute investment advice or a recommendation to buy, hold, or sell any security. Forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties. Past performance is not indicative of future results. Range defines "high earners" as households with income over $300k.
> Bank of America expects third-quarter investment banking fees to fall more than 10%; shares slide // …
> (Sunday) Brent crude tops $106 after Saudi Arabia shuts down critical pipeline that bypasses Strait of Hormuz // Critical hit.
> (Saturday) Larry Ellison nixes plan to offload up to $7.5 billion worth of Oracle stock // Someone let Davey know daddy may not have the cash he needs...
> (Friday) Hunter Biden crashes out over collapse of his $LAPTOP meme coin // Have we learned nothing from Hawk Tuah girl?
> (Friday) Anthropic caught Chinese AI labs carrying out massive illicit distillation attack // They not like us.
On Friday, I asked, “Hypothetical: You have to put your entire net worth in one of these and you can’t withdraw for 10 years minimum. Which one you picking?”
Dead tie for first. 32% of you said $FARTCOIN and another 32% said $TRUMP. Yeah, you’re pretty safe either way.
Here’s what some of you guys had to say (and my response in italics)…
$FARTCOIN: “They are all going to go to zero, might as well be able to make unfunny jokes about it.” No matter how old I get, fart jokes still make me laugh…
$TRUMP: “DJT Jr. can keep the party going for another decade.” Ironically a great point.
$LAPTOP: “its for topless lapdances, right? RIGHT?” Yup. (BONK.)
$PEPE: “Its pronounced Pee Pee, and I am going to ride that warm stream to the f***ing moon!!!!!” Bro it’s too early for that energy…
$HAWK: “Saw on X she got a breast enhancement... could’ve been AI though.” That’s terrible, where?
Here’s today’s question(s)…
Are you an AI boomer or an AI doomer?
+ US stocks rose Friday (S&P 500: +0.9%) as oil eased and an in-line CPI print snapped a four-day losing streak, then slid Monday (S&P 500: -0.5%) as the 10-year briefly kissed 5% and chipmakers led the retreat on fresh AI warnings. Down bad.
+ The 10-year yield gained Friday to 4.97% (its highest since October 2023) on sticky August CPI, then touched 5% Monday before easing to about 4.96%, with markets now pricing 90% odds of a Wednesday hike.
+ Oil eased Friday but still booked an 8%+ weekly gain, with Brent at $104.61 and WTI at $100.05, then settled about 1% higher Monday on new strikes to Saudi energy infrastructure and Middle East shipping. Everything hurts…
+ The “smart” money (prediction markets) thinks OpenAI’s chance of IPO this year just dropped to a mere 7%. (Polymarket)
Oh, and one more thing….
What did you think about today's newsletter?
Sent from my Amazon Fire Phone. Please excuse any mistakes and typos.
Pssst. Are you an AI bot? Click here to summarize TWC.
Does this look like the face of guys you should take financial advice from?
No, it’s the face of guys with a Memelord account and a wild imagination. So, act accordingly...
Oh, and if you want to put yourself in the memeverse like we do… sign up through our affiliate link here.
This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.