TOGETHER WITH
Hey there weekday warrior,
Here’s what’s on tap today… turns out Scam Altman can keep getting away with this, Zuck is gearing up to spill more blood, and NextEra Energy just bought itself a big, swingin’ $D.
Enjoy the next 3 minutes and 51 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.
Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,
PS… in case you missed the update, we are making some moves this Summer. Expect twice-weekly TWC for a bit.
PPS… thanks in advance for doing your part in keeping TWC free and independent (read: clicking and checking out our advertising partners daily).
Must acquit
Looks like Slippery Sam is off the hook… for now.
Yesterday, a jury of our peers found in favor of Scam Altman in Elon’s case against OpenAI.
The 9-person jury took less than 2 hours to deliberate after three weeks of proceedings. ChatGPT Claude presumably helped speed things along.
Which means Elon(‘s lawyers) really spent the last 3 weeks publicly dragging SammyGPT in front of all his friends for absolutely no reason.
“Worth it.” - Elon, probably
Friendly reminder: Phony Stark was seeking $150B in damages and a court order to destroy unwind OpenAI’s for-profit status.
It’s a yuge moment for the AI-multiverse…
See, on Friday, Elon accelerated the SpaceX (read: xAI) IPO timeline up to June on the Nasdaq. Under the ticker SPCX, which that’s kinda disappointing.
And in the blue corner, @sama has been racing toward IPO faster than I could reply “… and you thought you were having a sh*tty day” on this Tweet…
So, it’s all over now?
Lol, no.
You can bet the Diablo 4 champ is gonna appeal the case. And xAI is still pushing separate cases of trade-secret theft against OpenAI.
Live look at Elon in conference with his lawyers…
Your bank called. Said they don’t care about you.
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+ Zuck be like…
Meta $META ( ▲ 0.15% ) is scheduled to dump around 8k poor b*stards with big mortgages in SF on Wednesday. That’s 10% of the company. Oh, and Zuck’s plans to hire for 6k roles are also off the table.
Per some employees who are literally crying in the shower (which, who doesn’t?), things at Meta are chaotic, waiting to see which 10% of the team is getting chopped on Wednesday.
Meanwhile, Zuckbot is lifting his 2026 capex budget to $145B for more (yep) AI.
Check in with your friends at Meta…
The biggest power acquisition ever just landed. NextEra Energy $NEE ( ▼ 1.7% ) agreed to purchase Dominion Energy $D ( ▼ 0.57% ) (legendary ticker, by the way) for $67B in straight stock, homie. *and the ghost of Spirit Airlines is punching drywall right now*
I’ll save you the Gemini chat… that’s a 23% premium for Dominion stonkholders. The deal will need to be approved by Uncle Sam, but is expected to close in the next 12-18 months.
I really wish Ken Lay were around to see this.
+ An eye for an IRS…
Donny Taxes (and sons) dropped their $10B lawsuit against the IRS yesterday in exchange for a new “lawfare” fund of $1.776B (see what they did there?) to settle claims for allies prosecuted under the autopen Biden admin.
Friendly reminder: this whole thing started in January over the IRS leak of #47’s returns by a disgruntled IRS agent. Now the DOJ will have to pay out for persecuted Trump and persecuted Co., with your tax dollars.
*money printer go brrr…*
> (Monday) Trump says he’s postponing ‘scheduled attack of Iran tomorrow’ at Middle East leaders’ request // Someone just lost everything on Polymarket.
> (Monday) White House to Announce TrumpRx Expansion With Mark Cuban // Mark Cuban? The pharmacist?
> (Sunday) US Says China Agrees to Buy Farm Goods, Create Investment Board // Imagine paying $17B for corn and beans when you could just go to the grocery store.
> (Friday) Stephen Miran exits the Fed. How he set the stage for Kevin Warsh. // Bye Steve. Kevin Warsh is officially in the hot seat.
> (Friday) OpenAI, Plaid to Bring Tailored Financial Guidance to Masses // “Just give AI access to your bank account, bro. It’s completely safe, bro. Just trust Sam Altman, bro, he’s trustworthy.”
> (Friday) Bill Ackman’s Pershing Square discloses Microsoft stake, touts ‘deeply embedded’ software // Never bet against Excel.
> (Friday) Berkshire Hathaway reveals stakes in Delta, Macy’s as portfolio reshuffled under Warren Buffett’s successor // Imagine having to follow The Oracle…
> Excuse me, enough to what?
~827% borrow rate for the short squeeze. And the drill bit turns this year.
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On Friday, I asked, “You receive an invite to go party (unhinged, but nothing evil) with DJT, Xi, Elon, Tim, and Jensen for one night. Are you going or not?”
76.5% of you said, “Hell yes, once in a lifetime experience.” But we were still torn about it…
Here’s what some of you guys had to say (and my response in italics)…
Hell yes, once in a lifetime experience: “That guy Jensen f*cks. A lot.” You gotta assume, right?
Hell no, who cares?: “THIS is how you wind up in the E*stein Files.” Hey, I did technically say nothing evil.
Hell yes, once in a lifetime experience: “I want my t*ts signed by Jensen.” Sure, who doesn’t?
Hell yes, once in a lifetime experience: “Who says no?! Ketamine, titties, and whatever weird shit Tim Apple and Xibaby are into for a night? Then we become best friends, they invite me to rule the world with them and then we have a gas station fight with orange Julius's! It doesn’t get any better than that.” Songs would be written.
Hell yes, once in a lifetime experience: “I could get someone pregnant and just blame Elon.” Legit devious.
Here’s today’s question(s)…
Was OJ guil... (sike!). What's the worst thing about jury duty?
+ US stocks fell off a cliff Friday (S&P 500: -1.2%) on inflation fears and stayed pretty flat Monday (S&P 500: -0.07%) as everyone waits for Nvidia’s earnings… because in Jensen we trust.
🔴 (Monday) Seagate leads memory sell-off as CEO says it would ‘take too long’ to build new factories // Anything that takes too long isn’t worth doing.
+ The 10-year yield surged to its highest level in a year on Friday, and was little changed on Monday. Probably nothing…
+ The “smart” money (prediction markets) thinks that there’s a 64% chance the Clarity Act becomes law this year. (Polymarket)
⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…
+ Home Depot, Bilibili, Amer Sports, and Canaan report before the opening bell
+ CAVA, Keysight Technologies, and Toll Brothers drop earnings after the bell
+ It is the 25th anniversary of the opening of the first Apple store
+ Alphabet will hold its annual Google I/O developer conference
⏩⏩ On Wednesday…
+ Target, Lowe's, TJX, Analog Devices, and ZIM Integrated Shipping Services drop earnings before the bell
+ Nvidia, Intuit, e.l.f. Beauty, and Enersys report after hours
⏩⏩ On Thursday…
+ Walmart, Nio, Deere & Company, BJs Wholesale Club Holdings, Advance Auto Parts, NetEase, and Arqit Quantum report before the bell
+ Webull, Zoom, Take-Two, Workday, Deckers Outdoor Corporation, Copart, and Ross Stores report after the bell
Oh, and one more thing…
What did you think about today's newsletter?
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