Today we’re breaking down Google’s biggest deal ever. Plus, Wells Fargo has still got… it.

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 34 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

- tyler

PS, we’re not going to deep dive into the tragedy at the Trump rally in Pennsylvania this weekend. Mostly because that’s not why you’re here. There’s no shortage of coverage, and it’s just not TWC’s wheelhouse.

But, as a human being, I think there are a few things that need to be said…

First, I think it’s super important to remember there are people who lost a dad, husband, friend etc. on Saturday. Totally unexpectedly. Let’s not forget about Corey Comperatore and his loved ones.

And, second, my biggest fear is that things are going to get weird (I mean that in the worst possible way) over the next couple of months as this election plays out. My hope is we can all just remember that we’re on the same f*cking team (just know it took every fiber of my being to NOT post ‘Team America World Police’ clips).

+ US stocks “finished the week in rally mode, with all three major indexes logging gains on Friday and the Dow closing above 40,000 for the second time ever, though the Blue Chip index settled just over 2 points away from a record high.” (Yahoo! Finance)

+ The 10-year Treasury yield “was marginally lower on Friday as investors looked past a slightly hotter reading of wholesale inflation." (CNBC)

+ Oil “settled slightly lower on Friday as investors weighed weaker U.S. consumer sentiment against mounting hopes for a Federal Reserve rate cut in September.” (Reuters)

+ Bitcoin retook $60k over what was a pretty wild weekend…

+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) Trump Media +3.4% 2) Nvidia +1.4% 3) Tesla +2.9%

The market moves you need to know about…

+ EVgo was the beneficiary of a perfect storm of news and analyst notes. Shares jumped 18.6% on Friday thanks to solid delivery numbers from a handful of EV makers, lower CPI data that pointed towards rate cuts, and some kind words from Wall St. analysts.

+ Starbucks got the best kinda bump… the ‘unsubstantiated rumors about activist investor interest’ bump. SBUX rose 2.0% after TheDeal.com (which you’ve never heard of for a reason) speculated that Starbucks could be an activist target given how tremendously down bad it is.

Google: *botches roll out of consumer-facing AI products*

Also Google: “Hear me out… let’s buy a CRM provider cybersecurity firm…”

Now it’s starting to make a little more sense why Google (-0.3%) decided not to buy HubSpot… it actually had its eye on Wiz. No, not that Wiz…

This Wiz, which presumably can also “not be beat," offers cloud cybersecurity products and services.

The deal would value Wiz at ~$23B. For those of you keeping score at home, that would be Google’s largest acquisition of all time.

It’s not a total shocker…

Google’s gotten its M&A on in the cybersecurity space in the past. In fact, just two years ago, it bought Mandiant for $5.4B.

Not to mention, it could help Sundar Pichai and Co. play catch up to the big swingin’ d*cks in the cloud space. Microsoft’s Azure and Amazon’s AWS hold a commanding lead over Google at the moment.

Just one problem…

US regulators have been making it damn near impossible for big tech to close an acquisition.

+ Amid all the chaos this weekend, there is one thing that all Americans can (and always will) agree on: Wells Fargo is a sad excuse of a financial institution….

Earnings season kicked off on Friday with Citi, JPMorgan, and Wells dropping their results. And, welp, it wasn’t such a hot start. Shares of Citi, JPMorgan, and Wells fell 1.8%, 1.2%, and 6%, respectively.

You might have noticed that one of these is not like the others. All three banks beat earnings estimates. And all three raised concerns by hiking their loan loss provisions.

But Wells Fargo had investors uneasy after indicating that its cost-cutting measures aren’t going according to plan. The bank will almost certainly miss an expense reduction goal thanks in part to higher customer “remediation” and comp costs. Have they considered not letting bankers open fake accounts?

+ Honestly, this might be worse than the Ashley Madison leak for some of you guys…

In a regulatory filing, AT&T (-0.2%) said that hackers got access to, and downloaded call and text records for “nearly all” of its customers between May 1 and October 31, 2022.

But even if you’re not an AT&T customer, you’re probably not safe. If you chatted or texted with someone on the AT&T network, your a** is also exposed.

The good news is that the data doesn't include what was said. But your wife might be curious why you’re texting her best friend at 2 AM…

+ Today in “things that should come as a shock to literally no one”… Elon Musk and Bill Ackman officially endorsed Donny Politics for President. Both Twitter power users made their position official in the hours following the assassination attempt in PA.

+ Mario Gabelli (not to be confused with the disgraced TV personality/chef) might be trying to play spoiler in the Skydance-Paramount deal. Gabelli Funds owns a f*ck ton of Class A voting shares.

And now it’s seeking some more clarity on what Shari Redstone is being paid for her part in the deal.

The 82-year-old Gabelli took to Twitter to announce “Operation fish bowl.” Your grandpa would never…

+ Good news for everyone who took out a Redbox rental last week… it’s yours now.

You see, Redbox is going the way of MoviePass (and you thought there was only one national tragedy this weekend).

Earlier this month, Redbox’s parent company Chicken Soup for the Soul Entertainment filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. And late last week it filed for Chapter 7 (spoiler: that’s the liquidation variety).

+ Here’s how many Gen Zers rely on their parents to keep up with today’s high costs of living. Maybe they should stop eating so much avocado toast?

+ Neuropsychologist: 4 tips to stop the cycle of negative self-talk—your ‘thoughts are not the absolute truth’. #1: antianxiety meds.

+ Real estate investors are snapping up a record number of homes—especially in these 5 affordable cities. There’s no Whole Foods… yet.

🔥 Here’s the median salary in the 25 biggest U.S. cities—see how you compare. Prepare to be let down.

⏪ Friday we were keeping an eye on earnings from Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase, and Wells Fargo. Plus, PPI data.

+ Just me, or does it kinda feel like investors collectively agreed we’re all going to pretend PPI didn’t happen on Friday? The Producer Price Index came in a bit hotter than expected (0.2% vs. 0.1%) in June. But investors shrugged it off.

+ Full details on Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase, and Wells Fargo above

⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…

+ Goldman and BlackRock both report before the bell

+ Broadcom’s stock split goes into effect

+ J-Poww speaks at the Economic Club of Washington

Friday, I asked, “At what age should kids get cell phones?”

This was, by far, one of the most popular questions (which is great because now I can just ask all of my parenting questions and you guys can raise my kids by committee)…

Here’s today’s question…

Let’s keep it light today…

Facebook Marketplace does not miss…

Some Monday motivation…

Oh, and one more thing…

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.