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Hey there weekday warrior. Here’s what’s on tap today… JPMorgan Chase is going nuclear, Bill Ackman upset the other kind of activists, and what is it about being Mayor of NYC that makes dudes suck?
Enjoy the next 3 minutes and 31 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.
Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,
PS, I sent out a 5-minute survey over the weekend with one goal in mind: making TWC even better. If you didn’t have a chance, I’d really, really appreciate it if you took just a few minutes to complete it. Help me help you.
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To the mattresses
On Tuesday, JPMorgan Chase & Co $JPM ( ▼ 4.19% ) woke up and chose violence.
CFO Jeremy Barnum clapped back at #47’s call for a 10% cap on credit card rates. “If it were to happen, it would be very bad for consumers, very bad for the economy.”
For context, credit card loans totaled $247.8B for JPM as of December and generated $7.2B in revenue in Q4 alone, so… not really an objective perspective you’ve got there, is it, Jeremy?
In case you’re wondering “what’s got Jeremy’s panties in a bunch”… allow me to remind you that on Friday, Donny Credit put out a call for credit-card lenders to cap interest rates at 10% for a year.
And big banks got big mad.
Yesterday, Don encouraged Congress to support the Credit Card Competition Act, a bill that would target merchant fees on credit cards.
We still don’t have a lot of info on how DJT intends to push this one through, but clearly, Wall Street is going down like a Fall Out Boy song (read: swinging).
Meanwhile, sneak peek at big bank GOP donations after this one…
BONUS BEEF: JPM’s CFO wasn’t the only one throwing shade in the public domain. During the bank’s earnings call, Jamie made his position on the J-Poww investigation abundantly clear: “Everyone we know believes in Fed independence. And anything that chips away at that is probably not a great idea. And in my view, will have the reverse consequences. It’ll raise inflation expectations and probably increase rates over time.”
When asked about Jamie Stacks’ comment, POTUS said: “I think he’s wrong.”
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+ Can Fed chairs cut rates from federal prison? Asking for a friend…
Prices (the core CPI variety) rose 0.2% in December and locked in a 2.6% gain for the year. The good news? That’s a full 0.1% less than was expected. Headline CPI posted a 0.3% increase for the month and jumped 2.7% annually, in line with expectations.
Donny Economy instantly went to Truth Social to talk his book: “That means that Jerome “Too Late” Powell should cut interest rates, MEANINGFULLY!!! If he doesn’t he will just continue to be, “TOO LATE!”.”
What a time to be Fed Chair.
+ Activist on activist crime…
Chipotle $CMG ( ▼ 2.31% ) went all “we don’t claim him” on Bill Ackman to avoid a lefty boycott. See, turns out Billy Activism donated $10k to a GoFundMe for Jonathan Ross, aka that one ICE agent who shot Renee Good in Minneapolis.
The Mexican grill that brought us “guac is extra” and norovirus had to make a disavowal post on Threads (wtf is a Threads?) to make it clear that “Bill Ackman is not affiliated with Chipotle.” Despite his long history of affiliation…
Post-political career retirement options: Write a book go on a speaking tour crypto rug pull. Former NYC Mayor Eric Adams launched the “NYC Token" on Monday, a project that was supposed to “combat antisemitism and anti-Americanism” (huh?).
But once that token hit a cool $600M, it crashed 80% following a rug pull that had Hailey Welch drooling. Apparently, the token’s deployer removed $2.43 million in USDC liquidity. That reminds me, we need a TWC coin…
> Microsoft vows to ‘pay its way’ as it seeks to defuse data centre backlash (FT) // I don’t care how much Microsoft’s PR person is being paid… it isn’t enough.
> Oil prices rise more than 2% after Trump cancels meetings with Iran, tells protesters help is on the way (CNBC) // We’re getting WWIII before GTA VI, aren’t we?
> Meta to cut about 1,500 jobs in Reality Labs as Mark Zuckerberg doubles down on AI (NY Post) // Claude, make a billion people purchase AR technology by tomorrow. Make no mistakes.
> Nike signs phenom Anna Leigh Waters in its first pickleball deal (CNBC) // Huge day for your grandparents.
> We had a good run, you guys…
+ US stocks “fell on Tuesday as a milder inflation reading supported bets on medium-term Fed easing, while JPMorgan (JPM) results kicked off the fourth quarter earnings season with underwhelming results.” (Yahoo! Finance)
+ The 10-year yield “fell on Tuesday as data showed core U.S. consumer prices rose less than predicted in December.” (CNBC)
+ Oil “rose further Tuesday, shrugging off private survey data showing weekly U.S. crude inventories rose more than expected as elevated supply disruption risks remained front and center following significant anti-government protests in Iran.” (Reuters)
+ The “smart” money (prediction markets) thinks there’s a 40% chance that Iran strikes the US military by the end of the month. Which is… comforting. (Polymarket)
⏪ Yesterday…
+ JPMorgan Chase, Delta Air Lines, and Bank of New York Mellon reported before the bell
+ Denny's shareholders voted on the deal to be taken private by TriArtisan Capital Advisors
+ The Consumer Price Index report for December dropped
⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…
+ Bank of America, Citigroup, and Wells Fargo & Company report before the open
+ The Detroit Auto Show gets underway
+ OPEC will publish its monthly oil market report
+ The November Retail Sales report drops
+ The Federal Reserve will release its Beige Book Report
Yesterday, I asked, “After an unwatchable Golden Globes, I gotta know... what actor/actress did you like in movies/TV but now you can't watch because their real life personality is unbearable?”
38.4% of you said, “Mark Ruffalo.”
Here’s what some of you guys had to say…
Mark Ruffalo: “Winner, but really all of the above”
Gal Gadot: “There isn't a worse actress who got major roles recently.”
Mark Ruffalo: “Absolutely moronic when he speaks... has some dang good movies tho”
Mark Ruffalo: “The Hulk was supposed to be uncontrollable rage Ruffalo turned him into the angriest male feminist who still apologizes to his wife for looking at another woman’s Instagram story.”
Tom Cruise: “Not just because Tom Cruise is the only name I recognize on this list, his personal life has him as a cult member. ”
Here’s today’s question(s)…
Congrats to all whose teams made it through the Wild Card round (not bitter). Who we got going to the AFC Championship?
Oh, and one more thing…
What did you think about today's newsletter?
Sent from my Amazon Fire Phone. Please excuse any mistakes and typos.
Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?
No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...
This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.