Hey there weekday warrior,
Here’s what’s on tap today… Netflix just can’t make you happy, can it? Also, Ford and GM are about to make that Pentagon bread, and Anthropic doesn’t trust us with Mythos… yet.
Enjoy the next 3 minutes and 12 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.
Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,
Netflux
Netflix: *reports great earnings*
Shareholders: “Have you considered pivoting to an AI compute company?”
Netflix $NFLX ( ▲ 0.71% ) dropped its highly anticipated post-Warner Bros $WBD ( ▲ 0.07% ) merger fail earnings yesterday after markets closed, and let’s just say… it wasn’t great, Bob.
Shares immediately tumbled 9% after hours, due to the *checks notes* excellent results… wait, what?
The inventors of chilling delivered a beat on the top and bottom lines for Q1. Think: $12.2B revenue (up 16% from last year’s rev) and $1.23 earnings per share (double last year’s earnings).
So how did markets react? Well, it went a little bit like this…
It's hard to say exactly why, but one reason might be the departure of co-founder and board chairman Reed Hastings.
That’s right, Reed is retiring to focus on philanthropy, whatever that means…
Anyway, cue the next Netflix price hike…
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+ Cars Weapons
Donny Artillery has been hard at work to re-invigorate America(‘s military industrial complex). Turns out the Pentagon has been holding talks with Ford $F ( ▼ 1.17% ) CEO Jim Farley and GM $GM ( ▼ 0.06% ) CEO Mary Barra about aiding Uncle Sam in reloading our weapons stockpiles.
In case you are under the age of 70, this would be a real throwback to the WWII era of automakers cranking out military assets. WarSec Pete Hegseth AKA Bench Press Pete sees it as a step toward putting the US back on our bullsh*t “wartime footing.” Which, what is it good for? Absolutely nothing say it again.
Anthropic just dropped its new model Mythos Opus 4.7, which is supposedly better at software engineering, following instructions, and generally doing your wife job better than you. And while that’s mildly exciting (read: not exciting at all), the real news is the AI model that we aren’t getting yet…
Friendly reminder that Claude Mythos is still being held back from the general public, though it’s been released to the cybersecurity industry to prep them for the sh*tstorm to come… which is not terrifying at all.
And I think we can all agree
+ Investors: *lose their minds over a random company’s AI pivot*
Also, investors the literal next day:
Social media company Myseum $MYSE ( ▼ 2.32% ) pulled an Allbirds $BIRD ( ▼ 0.82% ) yesterday. Shares jumped over 150% after the penny stonk co. announced that it would change its name to Myseum.AI…
“But why tho?” - a sane person, probably
Well, apparently, when a company and AI love each other very much, they rename themselves [company].AI, and shares moon. Pretty simple to understand, really…
TheWaterCoolest.AI has a nice ring to it.
F*ck it, I’m opening up The Water Coolest’s playbook
I’ve been running TWC for nearly a decade.
And I’m finally pulling together all of my thoughts about creating killer newsletter content and building an audience the right way.
If you’re a serious newsletter operator (think: head of content, editor, CMO, creator), consider this your cheat sheet.
Every Thursday, I’ll send an email with playbooks and war stories from nearly a decade in the newsletter trenches. No filter, just like TWC.
> U.S. Navy blockade of Iran enters fourth day (CNBC) // Only two? Two??
> Michael Burry buys the dip in Salesforce and other software stocks after AI-fueled sell-off (CNBC) // Always gotta be a contrarian, huh?
> Paramount Vows to Keep Films in Theaters at Least 45 Days (Bloomberg) // Yep, that’ll fix Hollywood.
> Paying for a funeral would force more than half of Americans into debt (NY Post) // Cheery news only here at TWC.
> Makes sense…
Yesterday, I asked, “Which shoe brand camp are you in? And why?”
27.9% of you said, “Nike.” It’s called market dominance, sweetie, look it up.
Here’s what some of you guys had to say (and my response in italics)…
Nike: “Sorry, I don’t speak poor.”
Shots firedClip emptied.New Balance: “Grey 993s. Consistently generic and understated. Welcome to Club 40.” It’s certainly a choice.
Nike: “It’s the OG if you have narrow feet.” You know what they say about guys with narrow feet…
On: “A shoe is just a shoe until someone steps into it.” I think you might’ve meant to click “Nike,” sir…
Other (write-in): “Been into Lem's for a few years now. Hard to beat a good zero-drop ameri-chi brand started in Colorado.” Guys, we found the hippie.
Here’s today’s question(s)…
How many streaming entertainment subscriptions are you up to? Think: Netflix, Hulu, Spotify, Paramount+, HBO, YouTube Premium, etc. (I admit to having 3...)
+ US stocks “inched up Thursday evening after President Donald Trump said Israel and Lebanon had agreed to a 10-day ceasefire.” (Yahoo! Finance)
+ The 10-year yield “rose on Thursday as investors assessed the latest weekly jobless claims data and President Trump’s renewed attack on Federal Reserve Chairman Jerome Powell.” (CNBC)
+ Oil “rose on Thursday on skepticism that forthcoming peace talks between the U.S. and Iran would be able to resolve disruptions to Middle Eastern energy supplies caused by the ongoing war.” (Reuters)
+ The “smart” money (prediction markets) thinks that there’s a 27% chance that Harry Styles performs at the 2026 FIFA World Cup halftime show. (Polymarket)
⏪ Yesterday…
+ Taiwan Semiconductor, PepsiCo, Charles Schwab, Abbott Labs, U. S. Bancorp, Prologis, The Bank of New York Mellon, and The Travelers Companies reported before the bell
+ Netflix and Alcoa reported after the bell
⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…
+ Ally Financial and Truist Financial report before the opening bell
+ Boeing will hold its annual meeting
+ The Federal Reserve blackout period ahead of its next meeting begins. Fun fact: I used to have blackout periods in college, too.
Oh, and one more thing…
What did you think about today's newsletter?
Sent from my Amazon Fire Phone. Please excuse any mistakes and typos.
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