TOGETHER WITH

Here’s what’s on the agenda today…

The Fed is a sh*tshow right now, Amazon is giving us Rx vending machines, and Nvidia’s demand is through the roof.

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 19 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

– tyler

PS, loving The Water Coolest? Forward it to someone you want to hack an Amazon Rx vending machine with. If you CC me ([email protected]), I’ll send you both something.

PPS, did someone with great taste forward this to you? Subscribe here.

Surely the lack of important economic data (thanks to the government shutdown) won’t make the Fed’s rate decision at the end of this month damn near impossible…

Yesterday we got the minutes from the September FOMC meeting, and it’s shaping up to be awkward af around the Fedsgiving table this year. The only thing everyone could agree on was not to ask Lisa Cook for real estate advice…

ICYMI…

Powell & Co. cut rates by 0.25% at the September get-together, but that’s pretty much all they agreed on. Well, except the new guy. Trump-appointed Stephen Miran wanted to go full send with a 0.50% cut (I bet he sits alone at lunch).

Looking forward, the minutes showed some committee members want more cuts to save a cooling job market. Others are still clutching their pearls because “iNflaTioN.” According to the dot plot, most of the Fed members think we’ll see at least two more cuts before year-end.

That, obviously, was all the market needed to hear. Stonks hit record highs… again.

WTF does it mean for us?

Honestly, who the f*ck knows? The dynamics at the Fed are more of a disaster than two divorced parents handing off the kids in a well-lit parking lot for dad’s weekend (he has a new girlfriend). Combine that with the added uncertainty around data, and we could end up with a rate hike…

From beer gardens to harvest time wine tasting to spooky cocktails at Halloween, fall is full of opportunities for drinks with friends. Whether you’re celebrating a successful meme stock trade, or just out for a quick drink with the co-workers you actually like, being ready for the next day still matters.

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Fall will be gone before you know it, so get out there and enjoy it, and don’t forget the ZBiotics Pre-Alcohol Probiotic Drink.

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+ Purdue Pharma be like, “why didn’t we think of that?”

Amazon $AMZN ( ▲ 1.55% ) has an idea so crazy it might just work: pharmaceutical vending machines. It’ll roll them out at its One Medical locations so that you can get diagnosed with an STD and not have to look a real-life human in the eyes to get your prescription filled. The pill vending machines will be loaded with commonly dispensed drugs.

+ This is the biggest tech innovation since Apple started auto-loading one-time codes…

+ “Save some for the rest of us, David.” - every other media company to David Ellison

It appears David Ellison won’t stop until he spends all of his dad’s money. The Paramount Skydance $PSKY ( ▼ 2.32% ) CEO wants Warner Bros. Discovery worse than Scooter Braun wants you to know he’s dating Sydney Sweeney.

News already broke of his weird obsession with WBD. But now he’s calling in the big guns. Apollo is reportedly considering helping finance the deal that could reach $60B. One can only assume those negotiations went something like “do you know who my father is?”

The two are an unlikely pair, considering Apollo was bidding against Ellison/Skydance for Paramount at one point. What could possibly go wrong?

+ Yesterday, Nvidia $NVDA ( ▲ 2.2% ) CEO Jensen Huang said, “This year, particularly the last six months, demand of computing has gone up substantially,” which makes sense when you realize it’s the ringleader of whatever the f*ck this is…

The stonk popped on the news, because, of course, it did…

+ Does this mean I don’t need to pay estimated taxes? Asking for a friend…

As the government shutdown drags on to week 2, the IRS announced it will furlough roughly half of its workers.

+ US stocks “scored new all-time intraday and closing highs on Wednesday, a day after the broad market index snapped a seven-day winning streak because of a drop in Oracle that called to question the sustainability of the artificial intelligence trade. The U.S. government shutdown is also in its second week.” (CNBC)

+ The 10-year yield was “flat Wednesday as the government shutdown continued and the minutes from the September Federal Reserve meeting showed some indecision over the pace of future rate cuts.” (CNBC)

+ Oil “edged up about 1% to a one-week high on Wednesday as traders expected a lack of progress on a Ukraine peace deal to keep sanctions in place against Moscow, while a weekly report showed growing U.S. oil consumption.” (Reuters)

+ The “smart” money (prediction markets) thinks there’s a 36% chance AI will be TIME’s Person of the Year. (Kalshi)

⏪ Yesterday…

+ The Federal Reserve released the minutes from its last meeting

⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…

+ Pepsi, Delta Air Lines, and Tilray report before the close

+ Applied Digital Corporation and Levi’s report after the bell

+ Ferrari will reveal its first-ever all-electric vehicle during its Capital Markets Day

+ J-Poww will give welcome remarks before the Community Bank Conference

Yesterday, I asked, “You get $1M to give to your kids. You can't hold it in cash. What does it go into?”

47.9% of you said “SPY.“

Here’s what some of you guys had to say…

Here’s today’s question…

Oh, and one more thing…

Sent from my Amazon Fire Phone. Please excuse any mistakes and typos.

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.