TOGETHER WITH
Hey there weekday warrior,
Amazon made Anthropic an offer it couldn’t refuse (even though it really wanted to).
Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 24 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.
Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,
+ US stocks “closed near session highs on Friday as investors surveyed President-elect Donald Trump's efforts to build his team and bitcoin's (BTC-USD) bid to reach a key milestone.” (Yahoo! Finance)
+ The 10-year yield “edged lower on Friday as investors weighed mixed economic data and assessed the state of the economy.” (CNBC)
+ Oil “climbed about 1% on Friday, settling at a two-week high, as the intensifying war in Ukraine this week boosted the market's geopolitical risk premium.” (Reuters)
+ Bitcoin “pulled back below $96,000 on Sunday, suggesting that short-term traders are booking profits near $100,000.” (Cointelegraph)
+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) MicroStrategy +6.1% 2) Archer Aviation +4.5% 3) Rocket Lab +3.7%
The market moves you need to know about…
+ Hand up, I have no idea what a quantum computer is, and at this point, I’m too afraid to ask. Amazon did the quantum computing industry a solid on Friday when it introduced Quantum Embark, “an advisory program intended to help customers compute intensive use cases, develop an understanding of the state of the art, pinpoint relevant quantum technologies to focus on, and ultimately make informed decisions about future resourcing and their long-term quantum roadmap”… whatever the f*ck that actually means. Quantum Computing Inc. mooned 28.1%… probably because it was the first stock that popped up in a Robinhood search.
+ Ally Financial rose 1.7% (after giving up some bigger gainz) following news that it's considering selling its credit card unit.
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An offer they couldn't refuse
Source: Giphy
DOJ: “We should make Google unwind their investment in Anthropic as a punishment for running train on the ad market.”
Amazon: “Hold my beer.”
Imagine investing $8B and not getting a board seat… all while maintaining minority investor status. “Alexa, send Amazon CEO Andy Jassy a cuck chair.”
On Friday, Amazon (-0.6%) announced a $4B investment in Anthropic, bringing its total outlay to $8B. But this time it’s different: AWS will become the “primary cloud and training partner.”
So what exactly does a “primary cloud and training partner” do?
They make the $4B investment contingent on using their chips, of course.
As part of the deal, Anthropic will have to use Amazon’s Trainium and Inferentia chips to train their latest large language models… even though they’d really rather use Nvidia’s (seriously). To put it in sports terms, Anthropic would rather wear Nike shoes and apparel but got a deal it couldn’t pass up from Starbury.
Anthropic might have decided that dealing with the inferior chips was a small price to pay for the cash infusion. Especially when you consider Anthropic said it burned nearly $3B training its models in 2024.
The fun police have entered the chat…
Turns out that when one of the most powerful companies in the world makes it rain f*ck you money on one of the most successful gen AI companies to date, it raises some red flags in DC…
In fact, the FTC has already hit Amazon, Google, and Microsoft (who are all making yuge investments in AI companies) with the “what are your intentions with my daughter?”
Back in January, the Commish sent letters to Amazon, Google, Microsoft, Anthropic, and OpenAI asking what implications big tech’s massive cash injections had on the future of AI…
+ Death and taxes Wall Street fat cats securing influential roles in the US government…
After weeks of speculation about which white, male financier would get the Treasury Secretary nod from President-elect Trump, we have our answer: Scott Bessent, the founder of hedge fund Key Square Group.
In addition to the obligatory picture posing with sheets of fresh $1 bills (and a comically out-of-his-league wife) like a goddamn Bond villain, Bessent will be tasked with tackling the US’s $36T in debt and policing financial institutions (mostly Wells Fargo).
The news came just a few hours after “news broke” that Donny Politics planned to find himself a Secretary who could do both. Rumors were swirling that Kevin Warsh was about to be the Travis Hunter of finance. He was allegedly going to keep the Treasury seat warm until J-Poww vacated his position in 2026. And then take that role.
+ “Shut up and take my money…” - Americans
McDonald’s (+0.6%) made it official on Friday: the McValue menu drops on January 5th… just in time to destroy your New Year’s resolution. Also, I think we can all agree that they missed a huge opportunity to launch a day later with a “Storm your local McDonald’s” campaign…
The Golden Arches will extend the $5 meal deal through at least summer 2025. But that’s not the only thing that’s got future Ozempic patients all hot and bothered (to be fair it could be the high blood pressure…). The burger chain also plans to offer “Buy One, Add One for $1” on full-priced menu items.
+ Bad news for everyone who took the under on the total amount of fines collected by The Shortseller Enrichment Commission in the year of our lord 2024…
Gary Gensler’s SEC put up hall of fame numbers in 2024: $8.2B in fines collected… with a month to go. For those of you keeping score at home, that’s a 64% jump vs. last year.
Which is good because it will give Gary something to talk about in his interviews with financial institutions (friendly reminder: he’s stepping down on January 20th).
⚠️ Quick question…
+ ‘Stack the deck in your favor’ when you ask for more money at work, says ex-Google recruiter: Here’s how. Blackmail your boss with pics from the holiday party.
🔥 5 in-demand jobs that can pay over $100,000 and don’t require a bachelor’s degree. $100k is basically poverty in 2024…
FYI, TWC might be compensated if you click on the links above. So, what are you waiting for? Start clicking.
⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…
+ Pony AI (think: AI robotaxis) will price its IPO
+ Zoom and Blue Bird report after the close
On Friday, I asked, “Let's pretend the big 4 US sports leagues (NFL, NBA, NHL, MLB) go away. You have to pick one "secondary" league to follow. Which is it?”
Your top 3…
MLS
F1
NASCAR
Here’s what some of you had to say (and my thoughts in italics)…
MLS: "Fine, I guess I’ll pick soccer. I just know all of your East-coasters are gonna stuff the ballot box with lacrosse."
NASCAR: “Left turn, swapping paint, Rednecks and light lager, AKA cheap beer, how much better can it get." It doesn't get much more American.
Other: “Professional cycling - the Tour de France might be one of the most underrated sporting events of the year. Wouldn’t mind spending more time watching it and the other major cycling (Giro, Vuelta)” Ok, not US-based, but I'll let it slide because of American hero, Lance Armstrong.
WNBA: "As a Minnesota resident, the Lynx are just as enjoyable to watch as the Wolves (with MUCH better ball movement!).” Bonus: dunks just mean more.
F1: "Since Premier League isn't here, F1 is basically the Reality TV of sports"
Other: "ATP Tour. Tennis is the best. 1-1 competition. Doesn’t get better than that."
PLL: "Love lacrosse and the stuff Rabil is doing with the league is pretty cool. Believe the players all get some form of equity as well"
Other: “Curling, don’t think they have a pro league but it’s easily the best winter Olympic sport to watch."
And here’s today’s question…
You can only have one traditional Thanksgiving food item at Thanksgiving dinner. All the rest go away. Which is it?
Oh, and one more thing…
What did you think about today's newsletter?
Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?
No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...
This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.